Kindness needs clear boundaries.

Speak from your own experience and use phrases such as “what helped me”. Do not diagnose, prescribe, give dosage directions, interpret somebody’s results, promise cures or encourage anyone to ignore professional care.

For the Kitchen Table and first-person story walls, use a first name, nickname or Anonymous. A memorial may use the chosen, nicknamed or full name of the deceased person being remembered. Do not include addresses, contact details, hospital details, medical documents or private information that identifies another living person. Published material is public and may be found through search engines or shared.

A story photograph is optional and, during the pilot, must show only the adult contributor. It must not show another identifiable person or anyone under 18. You must own the photograph copyright or have permission from its copyright owner. Do not include private documents, contact details, graphic injury or distressing medical scenes. Provide a short description for people who cannot see the photograph.

A memorial photograph may show the person being remembered alone or with identifiable living adults. Every identifiable living adult shown must have agreed to that exact photograph being displayed publicly on Debbie. During the pilot, do not include an identifiable living person who is currently under 18. You must own the photograph copyright or have permission from its copyright owner for Debbie to process and publish it.

Do not include private documents, contact details, graphic injury or distressing medical scenes. Provide a short description for people who cannot see the photograph. Debbie checks, resizes, removes embedded metadata from and re-encodes accepted photographs before they are stored. If you are shown in a memorial photograph and want it reviewed or removed, use the private report control on that memorial. We can remove it from public view while the concern is checked.

No hate, harassment, threats, bullying, sexual misconduct, doxxing, grooming or pressure. Different diagnoses, treatment choices, family circumstances and grief responses deserve respect. Nobody has to be positive or inspirational to belong.

No scams, fundraising links, requests for money, recruitment, commercial promotion or miracle-product claims. Researchers, journalists and service providers need prior written permission and must not use the Kitchen Table to approach contributors.

People may talk honestly about distress. We will not publish content that encourages self-harm, gives dangerous or graphic detail, identifies a location or targets vulnerable people. Safety concerns are reviewed by a person. Debbie is not continuously monitored and cannot promise to locate or rescue an anonymous contributor.

Every contribution, story and memorial is reviewed before publication. During the pilot we publish only the version the contributor previewed and submitted. We may place it on a safety hold, decide not to publish it or remove it later, but we will not rewrite submitted words or crop a photograph. A Kitchen Table contributor can edit their complete wording through private management and send that exact revised version through normal review. Sending something does not guarantee publication and a decision not to publish is not a judgement on an experience or a person being remembered.

Published community content can be reported. Kitchen Table contributors manage their words through a private emailed link or the single private link shown after submission when no email was supplied. Story and memorial contributors contact us from the private email used to submit the item. No public account or password is needed. Every change and removal request is recorded and reviewed, with proportionate verification where it is needed.

The moderation desk and safety inbox are checked at least twice daily, seven days a week, but they are not monitored continuously and there are no fixed response hours. We aim to acknowledge safety complaints within two working days, decide ordinary reports within five working days and complete fresh reconsiderations within ten working days. Urgent items are prioritised at the next staffed check. To question a decision or make a broader safety complaint, read the complaints and reconsideration process or email safety@debbie.org.uk.

The first Kitchen Table, story wall and memorial pilots accept submissions only from people aged 18 or over. This is a limit on what Debbie can safely moderate at launch, not a suggestion that a younger person’s experience or grief matters less. The public support library and published community areas remain available without an account.